Getting Incorporated

Chuck Incorporated

2008-05-27T14:42:00.000-07:00

Like any corporation, I have the benefit of the brainpower of everyone who is working for me. It all ends up being my work, the corporate me, but everyone extends ideas and comes up with suggestions.

The Incorporation Process gets Infinite

2008-05-19T20:37:00.000-07:00

With tomorrow coming again and again, we are always trying to improve our list of services so that we can help the public to get as corporate as they need to be-- in an all natural, organic, free-range way of course.

With an eye towards a turbo-optimistic free market where the cycle between creativity and commerce is seamless and the boundaries are invisible, Client #00013a proudly brands the alley near the office with his self-proclaimed favorite brand, Prada.

Every consultation is different, because each client is a human- necessitating uniqueness, responsiveness, and some degree of free will. However, despite these forces of chance and spontaneity, every individual is asked to brand something (or someone) with a 5th Avenue logo. When the people place a logo where it has yet to be installed by the corporation that owns it, we believe that the customer is telling the future of the corporation and the object.

The metaphor of the action represents the empowerment of that individual to use the resources accidentally planted by a constant incorporation of life. The branding of new things also predicts, warns, and celebrates the merging of all things commercial and not (yet).

Our hope is that this process of active affirmation leads all parties closer to the truth of the future. Honesty and incorporation go hand in hand. Propaganda is the new forest, 5th Avenue is the new green, Morgan Ave is the New 5th Ave.

Have a great day starting now.

2008-05-14T09:27:00.000-07:00

Dear Clients,

On behalf of Future Unincorporated, I would like to thank you for taking the time out of your schedule to
HELP US HELP YOU.

We really enjoyed our time with you and hope that you feel sure that your purpose in life awaits you.
If you would like to review your experience, you can do that HERE.

HOWEVER, please don't live in the past. Visit www.futureunincorporated.com to make a follow up appointment, to read about our services, and to find online enlightenment.

Some follow-up questions to consider:
Do you feel better now that you have branded something?
Are you less confused about your plans now that you told a professional what they are?
Does incorporation still sound THAT BAD?
Can you imagine a new best possible scenario for 2012?

Feel free to respond with any or all of your responses.
Thank you again for the conversation, and we hope that it helped you to locate your future potential inner incorporation, and that you will have a teleconference with him/her/it very soon.

On behalf of our team of caring professionals,
Have a great day from now on!

Your Potential Consultation.

2008-05-14T09:26:00.000-07:00

Hello Potential Clients,
I write you on behalf of the staff at Future Unincorporated, a consulting company temporarily located in the window-front office of 3rd Ward in Bushwick.

We would like to congratulate you for creating the opportunity to engage with us about your future!!!
We believe that everybody's individual futures add up to the greater tomorrow. In order to maximize your potential role in the future, we recommend that you incorporate. As an individual you are granted much less power than you might be as a commercial entity. In order to locate your best dimension in the corporate future, we would like to lead you through a series of questions and exercises that will invigorate your truest infrastructure, eliminate your stale inner bureaucracy, and organize a deep down sense of wholeness so you can be the deep non-profit that you know you are already becoming.

Please email our staff to make an appointment to set these wheels in motion. Visit www.futureunincorporated.com to learn more about our goods and services.
To your future!
Cassie Thornton, BFA
Future Manager, CEO, Intern
Future Unincorporated

We hope to see you very soon...

2008-05-10T06:43:00.000-07:00

No matter what it takes, you're on the road to your future -- and you're not willing to wait for anyone to hold the door for you, either. Matter of fact, you'll be packed and ready to go before you even hear the driver tap the horn once.

Your Schedule Next Week

2008-05-04T13:39:00.000-07:00

Help us help ourselves- make an appointment today to get incorporated!
Make an appointment for a complimentary consultation in the Bushwick office of Future Unincorporated at 3rd Ward Brooklyn.

Beginning May 10, please feel obliged to meet with one of our professionals who will confront you about the functionality of your personal utilities in the face of tomorrow. A friendly face will consult you about the impending incorporation of Bushwick in 2012,
your role as a corporate entity,
and offer cake and advice if you would like that.

To join our corporate generosity campaign, make an appointment with a future manager-- before tomorrow is on top of you!
Email futurething@gmail.com to schedule an appointment.

The schedule for Saturdays in May is currently OPEN.
Email soon to get a prime time slot!

Trump gets tribal in Bushwick

2008-05-01T10:00:00.000-07:00

It is a sad thing to talk about... even our favorite patriot, DONALD TRUMP will likely be upset by the looming changes in the air. We suggest he rolls up his sleeves and digs into Bushwick. This is one mock up we would like to present as an option if he would be interested in investing in Morgan Ave. You know, it is the new 5th Ave.

Deadline: 2012

2008-05-01T08:01:00.000-07:00

Why has Future Unincorporated set its sights on 2012?

Well, it seems that this deadline is important because it is unclear what will exist after November of this year.

PREDEVELOPMENT.

Step one: We have suggested that one important NYC neighborhood, 5th Avenue, relocate to Bushwick (Brooklyn), which is still affordable and 'rugged', though well connected to the rest of NYC.
Step two: Bushwick begins a cultural preparedness program to successfully foster a new era of high culture within uncertain financial and global conditions. This means you! Artists, workers, SUBMIT! Try on the new business casual-- it won't hurt!

Our reasoning...

The gossip around town: Mayan cosmology forecasts that the world capitalist system will begin its final collapse in November of 2007...SO MOVE TO BUSHWICK WHILE IT IS STILL 'UNDERGROUND'!
Because it seems that by 2012 all of Manhattan will be looking for cover in Bushwick...

-

"There's going to be absolute pandemonium when it does happen, so I just want to be prepared so that I'm not a burden on anyone..."
-A prepared capitalist (hint, hint Bergie!)

"This is to offer some thoughts on the current American situation in the light of my recent readings on the Mayan calendar. It is popularly thought that the Mayan calendar of cosmic time comes to an end in 2012. It is sometimes surmised that nothing solid can be clearly known about life on earth beyond that fast approaching date. However, I read that the 2012 date marks the beginning of a new world of cosmic time. But not to leap ahead of ourselves, the Mayan cosmology forecasts that the world capitalist system will begin its final collapse in November of 2007."

"Here is our culture’s mythological winter experience. This is where the American capitalist dream-world collides with the cold heard granite of objective material reality. Debts become due, and organized systems of false consciousness become increasingly destabilized by the tectonic emergence of “reality.” Institutionalized denial of the real cosmic agenda that governs planetary evolution will shatter like a car driven by a drunk, colliding with a solid brick wall. Ouch, what fun!"

By Graeme Jones, copyright 2008

Now and Later

2008-05-01T07:47:00.000-07:00

Bushwick/Dubai/5th Avenue

2008-04-29T10:50:00.000-07:00

Why waste time? That is what Dubai said.
Please be introduced to the Burj Dubai: http://www.burjdubai.com/

Burj Dubai (Arabic: برج دبي‎ "Dubai Tower") is a skyscraper currently under construction in Dubai, United Arab Emirates, and is currently the tallest man-made structure on Earth. Construction began on September 21, 2004, and it is expected to be completed and ready for occupation in September 2009.^[1]

So we ask Bushwick, Tiffany and Co., Gucci, Bergdorf and Goodman's: WHY ARE YOU WASTING ANY TIME.

Bushwick could be the perfect hybrid of Dubai's 'why stop now?' sensibility mixed with the gloss of 5th Avenue and the 'beautiful grit' of Bushwick?

Here is one little mock-up we have worked on. See one Morgan Avenue warehouse's charm as it is accentuated by the addition:

Time Machiner

2008-04-28T21:58:00.000-07:00

Today we learned about something that must have been brewing for quite some time. It is not a moment too late: Time Machiner is an email program that sends emails to the future, up until 2030. So if a person wants to remind themselves of their banal existence at this particular moment, before the future happens, they may. Doing so, there will be a clearer understanding of past and future. Clearly the past starts when you hit send, and the future happens when you receive that email. We would like to recommend this handy tool to our clients.

http://www.timemachiner.com/

Before and After

2008-04-27T16:08:00.000-07:00

BUSHWICK 2008

BUSHWICK 2012

We hope you like it.

2008-04-25T14:11:00.000-07:00

Bushwick 2012.
When you see this do you get excited for the future?

How about now?
How about now?

Authentic Louis, Authentic Bushwick

2008-04-25T13:04:00.000-07:00

It seems natural that Louis Vuitton comes to Brooklyn to authenticate his work, which is already getting deflated by all these artists and pirate purse makers...

Below is a picture of a guy that was probably photographed inside this new Bushwick location of Louis Vuitton. Probably after 2012 this guy won't be able to afford his loft space in Bushwick but perhaps Louis will still go photograph him in his space even if he has to relocate to the Bronx or East Brooklyn.

Future Unincorporated suggests to Louis that he begin to pay attention to the potential clients and real estate in Bushwick now, before 2012, when real estate inflation and a serious recession will leave them no choice anyway.

Welcome to Morgan Ave., 5th Ave!

A stroll down UNIVERSAL LANE

2008-04-25T11:44:00.000-07:00

Universal is green, green is exclusive, exclusive is GUCCI, GUCCI is coming to Morgan Avenue in 2012.

Morgan Avenue is every avenue.

Future Unincorporated has ventured to predict the redevelopment of our favorite NY neighborhoods, and to prepare and welcome the renewal, rebirth, and regeneration of areas like Bushwick that have previously been guarded from the good things in life:
GREENNESS, LUXURY, SWIMMING POOLS, MOVIE STARS, FLOW, ENLIGHTENMENT, ETC., ETC.

So be the first in line to acknowledge the end of now and the beginning of a whole new luxury, predeveloped by the professionals at Future Unincorporated.

A whole new green is coming to Morgan Avenue this May. The idea is to eliminate the toxins of yesterday by recognizing the natural resources that abound in NY. We don't have many trees, but we do have the attention and products created by the corporate world powers that be, second only to nature itself. So give thanks for the bounty that you have, and come praise the NEW GREEN MOVEMENT.

NEW GREEN SPONSORS:

Do you know a corporation on 5th Avenue who is global, who is the master of their own domain, or who might want to relocate to Bushwick where they can also support the new green?

What time is it?

2008-04-10T08:18:00.001-07:00

TIME TO SAVE YOUR CORPORATE FUTURE.

Time for an update. A new idea we had here at Future Unincorporated is to encourage a Swiss watch company to relocate from 5th Avenue to Bushwick in time for 2012, as a part of the larger 'Saving Our Corporate Futures' program. We want to help Bushwick to become updated, and a better sense of time would help the neighborhood to become more aware of the time ticking away around them.

The proposal is not as one sided as it might seem. We are on all sides, protecting everyone with our greater sense of worry. In addition to updating Bushwick so it can have a corporate future like everyone else, we are also interested in protecting the corporate interests of large and exclusive companies. Their role in the life of an average consultant is vital for purposes of classification of people based on status and finance, for structuring our priorities in terms of consumption, self evaluation, and giving those of 'us' lower on the totem pole something to strive for. Piaget could be your new raison d'etre, so long as they move to Bushwick before the economy takes away their highly credited clients. The market has no borough boundaries. Relocation might not be an option, but a necessity.

New Opportunities on the Horizon

2008-04-09T20:04:00.000-07:00

There are a lot of opportunities for growth coming up in the future. One idea we have is that if Bergdorf Goodman really does want to move to Bushwick, a lot of the recent art school graduates might get jobs in their neighborhood instead of travelling to midtown or whatever. In our most humble educated opinion we would say that Mr. Andrew Goodman would prosper in this new location starting in the year 2012. Bergie's is the top rated retail chain for exclusivity, and associated social status of people who shop there, but even with such a special following, it is definitely strategic to imagine the complications of the implicit recession and the new client base that might be found among the rubble in industrial Brooklyn.

Coming Soon.

2008-04-07T21:16:00.001-07:00

Starting May 10, Future Unincorporated will open up a new temporary office in Bushwick, Brooklyn at 195 Morgan Avenue (3rd Ward) for about one month.

At our new location in Bushwick, we will be providing our services to help prepare our new neighborhood for participation in tomorrow.

In our office on Morgan Ave. (generously donated by 3rd Ward) we will be creating a scenario we expect to take place in the future on the streets of Bushwick.

Here is the scene: the year is 2012. Manhattan is filled with tourists and middle age white people compose the 'fringe'.

Even the shops on 5th Avenue can no longer afford their rents in Manhattan, and they have been pushed into Brooklyn.

The companies formerly located on two blocks of 5th Avenue decide to relocate to find a new market. Even Williamsburg is too expensive, so many of the businesses located between 56 and 59 St. on 5th Avenue have bought property in Bushwick. Prada has moved to 198 Morgan Ave., as pictured above.

Don’t shoot the messenger!

To prepare the community for this likely scenario, our experts have created a realistic installation on Morgan Avenue.

Signage, posters, and handouts will be distributed to inform residents, employees, and business owners in the neighborhood of the hypothetical influx of corporate franchises.

To help inform and counsel the local community, we will open our office to the public for consultations about their feelings and possible experiences of the future.
We will offer advice about the future and a shoulder to cry on to clients with appointments during selected business hours.
In addition to complimentary consultations, we will be raffling off futuristic survival tools for members of the so-called up-and-coming corporate community.

Stay tuned for more details...

Is it tomorrow yet?

2008-04-07T20:51:00.000-07:00

We are working on setting up our office in the basement of our Bedford-Stuyvesant location in Brooklyn, and we can't help but wonder if this is really what the future meant to bring. We know there are many good things coming despite the recession and our absent relationship with finance, but sometimes hours drag into days in the subterranean office. We are a socially networked type of corporation, but it certainly seems like we are the only office still open in this town. Please let us know if we can help you with anything.

Corporate Generosity Profile

2008-04-07T08:25:00.000-07:00

When you look at the profile of Future Unincorporated, we want you to see our positive, generous side. In order to look our best to you, we decided to create a pilot program to help our neighbors in NY, starting from the bottom.
This could be you:

Our first attempt to help people is to donate tools to update potential clients. The first step was to deliver a new laptop to emerging artists who might be lacking the tools they need to express themselves.
Do you ever feel like your ideas don't matter?
We do.

To put an end to these feelings, we delivered our first handmade laptop to Carey Maxon. We were excited to offer this opportunity for change. Things are going to be moving forward a lot faster now.

The possibilities just got more endless.

A few weeks later we held our first meeting to get the community excited about our new offer. Carey Maxon, now inspired artist and Future Unincorporated intern held a conference open to members of Bushwick University School of the Arts called

Consulting Myself: Making My Own Successful Art in Brooklyn

Lasagna was served, and we kept to a tight schedule.
The most important part of the meeting was the exhibition of Carey's final product. The digital revolution really got deep into her, and caused a lot of growth.

Please join us for the digital unveiling of her progression into the future-- this is what Future Unincorporated helped Carey to do!!!

And now... the opportunity has been passed on... A new generation of computers has been made available to emerging artists. We are waiting to see what Christine Maxon will do with her new product.The feeling of infinite possibility really took over the meeting.

Consulting Consultants.

2008-04-07T08:17:00.001-07:00

Lisa Paul
Originally uploaded by cassieshotz

In our business plan we mentioned that we planned to consult with other consultants. We have been meeting with Lisa Paul, who has been influencing us to develop our department of finance as well as our accounting/numerology department.
She mentioned that it might be a good idea for us to get on the famegame so we could get our name out there. We are not sure how we feel about fame, since consulting is a very personal process. Each client is a problem to be solved. We are top secret. However, we would like some famous, well paying clients.

That was two weeks ago: Bert Rodriguez

2008-04-04T05:09:00.001-07:00

Two weeks ago today, Future Unincorporated took a company field trip to the Park Avenue Armory show while part of the Whitney Biennial was still installed. Now that installation is in the past, as is the performance/installation by Bert Rodriguez.
As some of our longtime clients might remember, we are a selfless non-profit corporation and we offer free-range organic consultations. We act like we care because we do. We are not afraid of meaning. We meet people with the hope that we can use all of our services to help them regain functionality, so that ultimately everyone has a fair chance to become a sincere non-profit.
When we returned from the business trip to Finland, we learned that Bert Rodriguez was doing similar work, though he was calling it 'Art Therapy'. The frightening thing was that he was doing it from an 'office' as part of the Whitney Biennial, which seems painfully similar to our work in an 'office' giving consultations (no therapy here). Luckily that is all in the past now.

One morning over coffee, one of our employees was surprised to hear Bert's voice broadcast from WNYC while he offered 'art therapy' to NY listeners. We all agreed, 'good for him!' As any good business mind knows, competition opens up the market. Increased awareness of the importance of one on one idea installation can only broaden the market's awareness of the idea of one on one self service sold as art.

Back to the field trip... Our staff caught Bert during an interview, so we waited patiently outside his installation for a conversation. Since we are a mobile office, we can consult anyone at any time. All we need is space and time. Bert was very receptive to our wishes for a teleconsultation in the future. He seemed like a caring and patient guy, and we wonder if he will return our emails and phone calls. We hope we can have a conversation or collaboration with him. It seems like if we don't we will have to include him in our business plan on a page labelled 'obstacles to success'. Who knows what will happen after that.

Bert Rodriguez
Originally uploaded by libbyrosof

An Opportunity to Upgrade

2008-03-29T08:58:00.000-07:00

Dear Friends,
In conjunction with the Project1981 meeting this Sunday, March 30, the
Future Unincorporated would like you to participate in a revolutionary
scheme that will create a window for you into the future. Please join
us to learn about our masterminded scheme to assist artists in
generating wealth of ideas through the use of technology and inner
strength.
Future Unincorporated Presents:

Consulting Myself: Making My Own Successful Art in Brooklyn
WE INVITE YOU TO THE DIGITAL REVOLUTION.

As a consultant it is our premise that we wouldn't allow our friends
to operate with little or no access to technology or a solid business
plan. However, many of us do just that!! This program will assist
participants in updating their skills and will address the role of
"digital" and how a computer might fit into the life of an artist.

Participants will be offered an opportunity to participate in a once
in a life time opportunity to update themselves and their art
practices. Don't spend another day in the dungeon of yesterday!

The program will be presented by CEO and Future Manager, C.A.Thornton
promptly at 1:30 on Sunday, March 30. Please arrive at 1pm to get a
seat.

Presenters:
Cassie Thornton, BFA
Future Unincorporated CEO, Certified Future Manager, CPA, CFA, CMAA,
MPA, intern
Carey Maxon, Artist

Please RSVP by Friday March 29 to Carey (carey.maxon@gmail.com)

Note: RSVP's must be made prior to the program for building access purposes

May the forces be with you,
Cassie Thornton, BFA

Feeling good in the future.

2008-03-03T10:18:00.000-08:00

One of the best mottos:

Doing Good to Do Well…

Here at Future Unincorporated, we feel a lot of
Corporate Social Responsibility.
It feels good. Future Unincorporated wants to put the

corporate back in spiritual practices.

Corporations now successfully consider the interests of society by taking responsibility for the impact of their activities on customers, employees, shareholders, communities
and the environment in all aspects of their operations. However, we think that spiritual centers, holy individuals, and green organizations could channel their bounty more effectively.

The new corporate idealism

is most lucrative when it is synthesized from an essential truth. When revenue equals cost, one can maximize their assets to achieve supernormal profit. This natural sense of value comes from a sustainable inflation from a steady markup. When an entity can dissolve the fear involved with admitting the universal law of profit in all things, they can truly support the

sacred divine that exists in the chain of command.

The obligation of corporations extends beyond the statutory obligation to comply with legislation. Today we see organizations voluntarily taking further steps to improve the quality of life for employees and their families as well as for the local community and society at large.

Recent Events that have Passed On.

2008-03-03T07:47:00.000-08:00

THIS HAPPENED
Saturday, Feb 2, 8p (doors) to 4a
Jivamukti Yoga School
841 Broadway, 2nd Fl. (between 13th & 14th St. at Union Square)

$15 advance tickets, $20 door

Approximately one month ago, Future Unincorporated participated in its very first event as a Deep NY Non-profit. In collaboration with Reality Sandwich, an internet magazine spearheaded by Daniel Pinchbeck, we presented a well lit cubicle to illuminate Jivamukti during an event called 'Evolver: Wake Up and Dream'.

For the Evolver event, we introduced:
Bureaucratic Bounty: produces a general sense of confusion composed of a series of specific awkward tasks all heavily laden in rules and poorly described expectations.

The Enlightened Cubicle: fearlessly shines fluorescent light onto our clients eyes in a very dark and murky atmosphere.

Complimentary Consultations: begin with a client interview with a member of management. We discuss quality of life, which we document and judge based on our own sense of the corporate value scale.

Personal Potential Power Profile: We judge each client to determine their relationship to corporate spiritual powerfulness.

Intention Projection: is a system of projecting the overhead of the clients’ wishes and needs onto the wall and into public view, pushing desires into the atmosphere and into the awareness of strangers. We believe this creates a better success to failure ratio.

Party Financial Analysis: is an entrance poll of the expected income of the attendees for the coming week. The progress of the survey is charted on a graph and projected for public view.

Poll of the Future: requires clients to cast their vote for what will inevitably befall them. They choose to elect a specific prediction, desire, or fear.

Infinite Certainty Compost: Voters cast their ballots into our patented ballot shredding machine, clearing the bad karma away for the next fiscal cycle.

NY State Prescription Planning: When we can see a client needs something extra to extend or build their functionality…

Responsible Distribution of Paperwork: We distribute informational pamphlets, cards, prescriptions, and more- but only to people who are interested, or if they promised to recycle it.

New York Office OPEN FOR BUSINESS

2008-03-03T07:18:00.000-08:00

Time moves forward, and so do we.
Today is the first day of official office hours at our new prime location in Brooklyn, NY.
We will be taking appointments for consultations from
9am to 1pm est
in our NY bureau office.

Since we have been on the road, the mobile office has gone through a lot of changes. We are making sacrifices to do what is best for the corporation. In NYC being incorporated requires a different level of competition and offensive marketing strategies.

We have been meeting with professionals to update our business plan to better suit
YOU, OUR PRIMARY CUSTOMER and reason for being,
and to keep our head above the high tides.

We are planning a public presentation of our business plan followed by a discussion in coming weeks. Seats are limited so please show your interest with a raise of virtual hands.
Just as in Finland, you can expect the best that Consulting has to offer. Our goal is the same, to give and take advice. We offer a plethora of services that will extend or build the functionality of our clients to meet the unique requirements of everyday.

Feel free to print out our new handbill above to read about our new products, and feel free to distribute them to your friends, loved ones, and strangers (we charge if you would like to make some door to door deliveries).

Satellite Offices

2008-02-21T07:42:00.001-08:00

We now have satellite offices in several locations, and they will continue to operate during office hours. We are expanding as an unincorporated entity every day. By next week we might have offices on three continents:

Europe
(Haukivuori, Finland): Stand-in top dog consultant Marja DeJong

Asia
(Kyoto, Japan): Permanent Executive Powerful Adminstrator Miyuki Kido

North America
(Brooklyn, NY): Future Manager, Dr. CAThornton, BFA

A big warm 'thank you!' goes out to all the staff that is keeping the Future Unincorporated alive! Your belief in the power of the infinite fiscal calendar is what gives us the will to go on.

Plans for Tomorrow Already Happened

2008-02-21T07:16:00.000-08:00

It seems like just yesterday we were planning for the future,
which we decided would take place in NYC. In case you missed the news,

Future Unincorporated has relocated to New York City.

After months of preparation and worry, we made our big jump. Without skipping a beat,
the future has been happening for four weeks already.

Not to worry, we are still very concerned about Finland, but from the control center of the world, we feel like we are in the center of everything. In fact, we can worry about the futures of many different countries and people that exist outside of NYC, because now everything else seems fictitious.

Our classifications and analysis of former clients is now much simpler because they now seem like characters from a fairytale. It makes our consultations and predictions much simpler if we are just working with the idea of people rather than real ones.

We are now ready to present the rest of our research from our extended business trip to Haukivuori, Finland. Please be patient as we take our time to present you with our strategic analysis of what is going to happen based on what already did.

We are so open for business. Make an appointment with a consultant for a report on your status.

Mark today in your calendar as a very important day to remember in the Future!!!

2008-01-20T12:09:00.001-08:00

Today was a great day for our understanding of the Future. As previously advertised, it was an Official Open House at the Office.

Due to yesterday's wonderful beautiful snowfall (the weather has been worse than glum for weeks), the general spirit of the staff was lifted, and business proceeded at a happy skipping pace.

Last night (Saturday) we installed a sign at the local gas station to draw locals to the office for the open house. We didn't expect anyone to come, but we thought it was a good gesture.

On the walk back from the gas station, the advertising department had a great idea: we could make invitations for consultations and tie them to the doorknobs of all the neighbors. So like a goodwilled swat team in the night, at midnight we divided and delivered invitations everywhere we passed on our one hour neighbor search. We didn't forget the forest people and gypsies in the forest either- we hung invitations on the trees at eye level.

This morning we began by preparing the office for openness. We packed our usual box with the usual tea and safety lamp, but because today was a special day, we also packed a few pieces of cake. In the future, we think people will need to eat less cake, but we decided to serve it anyway just to lure the locals.

The lure of the cake didn't really work, and neither did the advertising campaign or the invitations. However, the snow blew in a local man named Lucien, and by chance he had time for an interview. Details on the consultation to come.

It was clear that he really appreciated the cake. The expensive humidification system in the office caused his glasses to fog up a little, but he continued the interview with blind perseverance. Thank you Lucien!

After that meeting, before darkness ended the possibility of visitors, the entire staff from the Future decided that we needed to approach our consultations differently. With more spirit, more action, more CORNERING.

Like a used Bible Sales staff, this Sunday we began to go door to door to offer at home consultations. We began with a neighbor, Rauni, who is the village's General Physician. She invited us in for a home visit/ consultation.

Before it was dark, we departed for Ana's house where we demanded an interview also. She is the art teacher at all the local schools in the village.

We will give a profile of all three interviews in the days to come.

The final news of the day comes to us from the administrative desk... There has been a promotion! We would like to announce that Miyuki Kido, previously a part time secretary for The Future Unincorporated, has been elevated to the title of

Permanent Executive Presidential Secretary.
Congratulations Miyuki, and thanks for all your hard work!

Office Policies for Tomorrow

2008-01-18T14:37:00.000-08:00

As we approach the end of the Finnish office, we just want to remind our clients of a few things.
1. Tardiness rushes our conversation about the future.
2. Cancellations stop time from happening in the office.

We will forgive all cancellations and tardy clients up until this point. We prepare tirelessly for all our meetings, and an abrupt change of plans complicates our schedule and keeps us from serving our other customers with the same grace and preparation that we aim to give to each individual. Thank you for understanding.
Please come to our office party next Tuesday.

Interview Profile: Kaick

2008-01-18T13:37:00.001-08:00

We met Kaick on our first day in Haukivuori. We were introduced at a Christmas Fair in the village gym, and Kaick drove us back to the office and gave a quick tour of the area on the way.

Kaick is a psychiatric nurse. He drinks coffee for breakfast. It is preground coffee, bought at a local market imported from Germany. He explained many expectations for Haukivuori, Finland, and the world in terms of population, natural disasters, food politics, and he also has a plan for what he will do in his own personal future.Predictions of Kaick:
1. Population of Finland doubles in 30 years due to Western European migration out of urban areas.
2. Food production ban/ import-export ban: This includes sea fishing worldwide. This is one of Kaick's hopes- he expects that it is possible in 25 years (that we need that much time to realize the necessity of the ban).
3. In 10 years there will be much larger natural disasters than we have experienced before, where millions of people die.
4. Kaick will work at his job for 10 more years and then retire. He will travel in the winters, saving February and March for ice fishing.

Please click on the notes below to read my expansion on the original notes.

Notes on meeting with Kaick

Originally uploaded by cassieshotz

Interview Profile: Birgitta

2008-01-18T09:12:00.001-08:00

CONSULTING WITH A CONSULTANT
As some of our loyal readers might recall, in the infant stages of the Future Uninc., we had come across a fellow consultant from the area while taking a video course at a local university. We had lunch together the day we met and we learned of our mutual passion for consulting (it made her late for her next meeting). She helped us to develop our ability to communicate about our important work with Finns by translating important business terms. Last week Birgitta came for a site visit/ interview. We were impressed with her professionalism and with HOW MUCH ADVICE she had for us!!

Click on the paper above to see our notes on the consultation.
We anticipated some friendly competition with our new acquaintance, but it turns out our fears and excitement were unnecessary. Birgitta had no interest in a competitive relationship, she took us on as any good entrepreneur would: she used the term collaboration when describing some hypothetical business plans for our two firms, but what she was referring to is called a congeneric merger, which occurs when two merging firms are in the same general industry, but they have no mutual buyer/customer or supplier relationship. She is a sly business tycoon.

Here is one of the plans she surprised us with:

This was a map of a plan for expansion that could happen in several stages to the Future Unincorporated office. No plans were agreed upon. With a little EU support, she planted all sorts of ideas for future expansion. Click to enlarge.

She also brought some gifts: from her corporation to ours. There was a lot of fast talking and numbers being thrown around. We are not sure if anything was agreed on, but we are not sure because we don't speak the same language as our clients.

Yesterday and Today and then Tomorrow

2008-01-18T07:18:00.000-08:00

Today as we were going through some of our old files, we came across some ancient designs from back when the Future Uninc. was just a concept.

We thought some of our longtime customers might appreciate this-- a reminder of the time BEFORE the Finland office existed (as if). At this time we were concentrating more on the idea of making as much paperwork as possible, so understandably we were looking to masterminds like Terry Gilliam (especially in Brazil) for descriptions of a well oiled corporation.

Now that we are fully established as the predominant consulting firm in the forest, we have adapted our design a bit to embody the spirit of our type of consulting. We try to mask the paperwork, the deadlines, the neck to neck competition brought on by the crashing stock market, and our struggle to maintain ourselves as our home economy struggles with a looming recession-- all so we can get down to business with our customers in the forest-- with hot tea, warm conversation, and cool advice.

Call it a friendly conversation, we call it consulting.

Save the Date!
Sunday, January 20 Open House at the Office
(daylight hours-- advertisements posted at gas station)
Tuesday, January 22 Closing Office Party
(after dark- please rsvp for details)
refreshments will be served!!

Tell us how we're doing.

2008-01-17T07:41:00.000-08:00

We want to know what you think of Future Unincorporated.

We are refining our web presence and we want to know what you think about it.

Please visit www.futureunincorporated.com
and drop us a note to let us know if we did a good job.

It is hard to tell if the new site looks good when the computer screen keeps fogging up-- the dehumidifier in the office cannot keep up with the high temperature and the consequential melting snow.

Also, if you have any questions about the future, please send an email to cassie.thornton@gmail.com; it turns out that the email address posted previously (info@futureunincorporated.com) is malfunctioning, so we will temporarily be using one of our employees home addresses. The old email will be working soon, as soon as we can get ahold of the IT person.

The Bright Future

2008-01-10T04:19:00.000-08:00

First of all, the staff at Future Unincorporated would like to thank everyone who has joined us for a consultation, a follow-up home visit, a teleconference, or a meeting during our stay in Finland. The interviews that we have completed so far have created a deeper understanding of Haukivuori and of Finland. With every conversation our predictions for the future change, and our understanding of tomorrow is updated. In each client we have found a wealth of information to be tapped, packaged and sold to others at twice the price. The bond between a consultant and consultee is deep and long lasting. Sadly, the time has come to predict an end to the Future Uninc. of Finland. We will be accepting the last appointment on Tuesday, January 22 at sundown. After that the office will be closed.

The good news is that Future Unincorporated will be relocating to NYC. Due to the high cost of real estate in the NY area, we will not have an office, but will be touring the five boroughs as a happily homeless corporation. Of course we will still offer the same professional level of expertise about the future. Please join us for our first appearance:
Saturday, Feb 2, 8p (doors) to 4a
Jivamukti Yoga School
841 Broadway, 2nd Fl. (between 13th & 14th St. at Union Square)
$15 advance tickets, $20 door

More details will follow. Please email info (at) futureunincorporated (dot) com for more information.

January 12 Event

2008-01-07T15:07:00.000-08:00

Please join us on January 12 for one of the final opportunities to become acquainted with the staff at Future Unincorporated in the Finland branch. This coming Saturday, in conjunction with a New Years Party hosted by Marja Dejong in the library of Saksala Artradius, we will be offering free appointments for consultation at the office. Please make your appointments now. Office hours will last as long as there is light outside. At dusk a special guest-- one of our top consultants/ future managers-- will join us for a special VIP event:

FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE: Please come to our first ever public prediction poll, after dark on Saturday January 12! Join one of our qualified future managers and cast your vote in the 'crystal ball-ot box' and have a stake in the future before it is too late. Please email us at info (at) futureunincorporated (dot) com for details.

News from the Future: Last Week

2008-01-06T03:25:00.000-08:00

Last week we installed a sign made by an expert local craftsperson. We heard from the neighbors that the new sign is working very well. Since we installed it there has been a lot of buzz around the forest about what is going to happen in the upcoming future. Because of all the attention we have been receiving at the Future Unincorporated, we highly recommend that clients make appointments. We may not be able to accommodate visitors without appointments.

For the sign we decided on a white and black color scheme to contrast with the woodsy atmosphere surrounding the office. Now it will be easy for our customers to know that they are at the right office building.

We have now installed some futuristic technologies to bring us into 2008 thanks to a generous gift from Saksala Artradius. In the following days we will be installing a very complicated system of computers, copy machines, and keyboards to help us better measure the future from the office. Even in the forest, the future just keeps coming!

We are really getting somewhere.

2007-12-28T08:44:00.001-08:00

Because we are going places.

We have had a full schedule of interviews this week.
We thank all our customers for braving the terrible weather and coming to the office for a meeting. Your receipts are being processed.

Kiitos to Verpi, Merwa, and Catherine!

Make an Appointment with a Consultant. Today.

2007-12-26T11:25:00.000-08:00

We are now taking appointments for interviews in the office with a professional consultant.
Please email info@futureunincorporated to schedule a time to meet at the office.
Our office days for the remainder of the year are:
Daylight: December 28, 29, 30, 31.
In January, we will accept appointments only for January 4 until further notice.

Open House Tomorrow!

2007-12-25T08:16:00.001-08:00

ATTENTION CUSTOMERS
Tomorrow, December 26 from 3pm until 6pm
Special Boxing Day Office Hours
Please come for a FREE INTRODUCTORY CONSULTATION

Directions: From Saksala Artradius, head to the gray art residence building. Continue Northwest (follow the orange flags) to the farm field. Cut through the potatoes. When you see the small lit building, follow the path through the tall grass, stay on the left and then head down the small plateau. Be sure to step around the fire hoses. Please excuse our appearance, we are permanently under construction. We are always updating the space to better serve our clients.

Infomercial

2007-12-23T11:46:00.000-08:00

In the new fiscal year...

2007-12-23T09:55:00.001-08:00

As you can see, the design department has taken a quick break for some glogg and dry toast to celebrate the holiday season, and for a quick trip to light some candles at the cemetery. As a new corporation, every moment counts, but we still have priorities besides productivity. One of those priorities is giving the staff some time away from the office to enjoy the cheerful holidays.

However, we do know how these holidays can slip by-- and before you know it, a few days are tossed to the wolves, and they become nothing but black holes on your calendar! So we have some tips for how to start this new year on the right foot.
Tip #1 Start designing a tax system that will actually work this year. Yes, you have been doing your taxes since April, but you might not be doing it right. We recommend that on these long winter days the staff reconsider the ways they are recording their income and expenditures.
Don't stop there:
Tip #2 It is not a bad idea to document your activities on an hourly basis. It will be much easier to prove what your worth at the company is. Based on the value of your time, we can decide how much to pay you.
One of our most devoted employees is making a 'receipt of their life'. The more we know, the better we can judge her. Now she is really part of the team.It looks as though she has made some sort of pulley system for the receipt right next to her desk. She works long hours so this is very convenient for her! She will have a great new year, fiscally and spiritually if she keeps up the good work!

www.futureunincorporated.com

2007-12-23T01:25:00.001-08:00

Thanks to a generous Christmas e-gift from one of our Board Members:
Chief of Domain: Mark Strzalka from Fox Lake, Illinois--
The Future Unincorporated can now be found on the WORLD WIDE WEB!!!
Please click on the link above to access our new site, which is:
http://www.futureunincorporated.com
BOOKMARKIT!
The Design Department has been working around the clock to get the site up and running before the new year.

We wish you a bright future!

2007-12-22T06:54:00.001-08:00

Happy holidays from The Future, Uninc.
Last night some of the staff got together for a little Christmas party.
The moon was very bright, and the sky was filled with stars...
There was even a rumor that one of the workers saw the constellation Orion!
We are sorry you couldn't make it-- it wasn't the same without you.
Don't worry, next time you can bring the Gloggi! Haha!

More importantly, there have been some changes to the schedule.
Please make an appointment before visiting the office during the holiday week.

HOLIDAY OFFICE HOURS
1PM-2PM DAILY

Happy New Year!

Recent Renovations to the Office

2007-12-20T12:45:00.001-08:00

The long awaited walls were installed today at the office. It seems that the architects that had been hired were incompetent, but finally we found a local interior designer who could do the job for half the price. It turned out that we couldn't cover all the walls we had planned to because of the water damage from the fire a few years ago, but the office environment has really improved.
Pictured above is the front desk area, with that beautiful sky light. You can also see an authentic pulley from the original time machine system.
Here is the waiting area that doubles as a childcare center for the staff. On the left is the new staircase that was installed yesterday. We hadn't realized how unsafe the office was until one of the employees fell into the well yesterday. Luckily we were able to replace the whole thing immediately. It could have been a real nightmare with the insurance company if it had happened to the wrong person. We were really lucky.
Here is the original door handle, hand carved birch, that we have chosen to leave.
This is the old time machine pump (kerta kone pumpata?) that has been dormant since the fire. We are getting quotes in town to see if we can get her up and running again before the winter is over.

American Traditions in Finland

2007-12-20T12:18:00.000-08:00

Yesterday was Wednesday, now known as Donut Day in Haukivuori. As the corporation has been adapting to accommodate Finnish traditions, (especially since the grand opening will take place within the Christmas season, the original timeline has gone out the window-- THREE days for Christmas?) we thought we would share a little sample of our where we come from with our clientele.
Traditions of OFFICE CULTURE:
Donut Day Wednesday
Dress down Friday (jeans are ok, no tube tops!)
Take your daughter to work day
The Office Christmas Party
The Going Away Party (two types)
a) you have been let go
b) you have quit
The Future Uninc. will do its best to represent these traditions with as much authenticity as possible. Office hours have been posted and will be maintained throughout the holiday season unless otherwise mentioned.

To Consult is...

2007-12-20T07:07:00.000-08:00

At Future Unincorporated, consulting is a two sided word. To consult is to give or to take advice or information. We take this duality seriously, and we bring it to the office.

When we consult our customers, we ask as many questions as we can, because we care about people and we believe people will exist in the future.

Yesterday we had a chance meeting with Birgitta, a fellow Consultant from the nearest city, Mikkeli. We asked her how Finnish people talk about the business of the future.

Consulting Company=Konsultointi Firma
to consult=konsultoida

It was a great opportunity to speak with someone in our field. I am sure we will be able to offer each other a lot of advice and information about our special expertise. Hopefully we will not have to compete with her for clients.
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The objective of the corporation is to consult with Finns about their future. First we must get a client base. The process begins with putting out invitations to the community, though we don't speak the same language. So Future Unincorporated must make our good intentions clear.

Once an appointment is made, each customer will be invited to the office in the forest for a 'getting to know you' interview. After a basic measurement of the community is taken this way, we will make predictions about the future (tulevaisuus). Our hope is that the interview itself will cause each person to imagine and describe their own timeline, and will subsequently lead them to visualize themselves as part the future of Finland and of the world.

Each client will receive a receipt after the meeting.

Introduction to the Future

2007-12-19T05:52:00.000-08:00

This blog is a journal that will document the process of starting The Future Unincorporated, a homeless corporation in Haukivuori, Finland. I am an artist in residence at Saksala Artradius for December 07/ January 08.

The Future Unincorporated is a corporation operated by one employee. It is a consulting firm, and it will be temporarily based in a building on the edge of the forest in Haukivuori. The main focus of the corporation will be to create a conversation about the future of Haukivuori and the world with people that live here.After a few weeks of wandering in the forest looking for the most appropriate space for a Consulting Firm, I found a small abandoned house just southwest of my residence. It was an old pump house built on top of the well. A fire had burned a hole in the roof (making a very nice skylight) and ruined the pump, causing the building to be abandoned for a few years. It will be a great office. A real fixer-upper, but it already has some of its old snap back. It is permanently under repair, but open during construction.

Please forgive our appearance while we adapt our shack to serve you better.